My Utmost - January 19

This is a little excerpt from My Utmost for His Highest by Oswald Chambers.

This book is my daily devotional.. little kick start for my day.

This one spoke to me heaps a few weeks ago, and I think it's appropriate to share after my last blog.

Vision & Darkness

"When the sun was going down, a deep sleep fell upon Abram; and behold, a horror and great darkness fell upon him." -Genesis 15:12

Whenever God gives a vision to a Christian, it is as if He puts him in "the shadow of His hand" (Isaiah 49:2). The saint's duty is to be still and listen. There is a "darkness" that comes from too much light - that is the time to listen. The story of Abram and Hagar in Genesis 16 is an excellent example of listening to so-called good advice during a time of darkness, rather than waiting for God to send the light. When God gives you a vision and darkness follows, wait. God will bring the vision He has given you to reality in your life if you will wait on His timing. Never try to help God fulfill His word. Abram went through thirteen years of silence, but in those years all of his self-sufficiency was destroyed. He grew past the point of relying on his own common sense. Those years of silence were a time of discipline, not a period of God's displeasure. There is never any need to pretend that your life is filled with joy and confidence; just wait upon God and be grounded in Him. (See Isaiah 50:10-11)

Do I trust at all in the flesh? Or have I learned to go beyond all confidence in myself and other people of God? Do I trust in books and prayers or others joys in my life? Or have I placed my confidence in God Himself, not in His blessings? "I am Almighty God..." - El-Shaddai, the All-Powerful God (Genesis 17:1) The reason we are all being disciplined is that we will know God is real. As soon as God becomes real to us, people pale by comparison, becoming shadows of reality. Nothing that other saints do or say can ever upset the one who is built on God.

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--- As I said, I read this a few weeks ago in my devotional which was pretty impacting. It literally brought me joy in my time of darkness. My friend Nico (in the photo) would ask me what's wrong, or how I'm doing, and all I could say was 'something is off, I have no idea what it is, but I KNOW that God is going to teach me something epic'

And it was the weirdest thing. I had such peace at the same time I was having such pain.

 Confusing right? That's the beauty of God. When you can fully trust in Him, even when you have no understanding or idea what is going on, just holdfast and know that something amazing is going to be brought to your mind, it will shape you for life.

I love when bad things happen to me, because I know I will be able to use it as a testimony to bring God glory. 

I just sit patiently, try not to spend my time figuring it out, but trusting God for something crazy.

And I  ALWAYS feel SO different at the end of a "dark" season! 

This feeling of weight is lifted and my eyes feel renewed; it's as if I'm seeing things in a whole new light.

Praise you Abba, thank you for your goodness and faithfulness!

Be blessed friends! :) 

xo